What is a Funeral Repast | The Art Of Condolence (2023)

Benefit of a Funeral Repast

1) Comfort loved ones and offer support

Part of the grieving process and the healing process is to talk and share feelings. This is sometimes hard to do and harder if one is alone. By attending a Repast, people have an informal opportunity to chat and reminisce about the deceased. People who are shy and not used to public speaking can simply listen and feel that they are involved in the process. Grieving together goes a long way toward helping the healing process and a Repast offers the opportunity for all to get involved.

2) Allow family members to bond

At a Repast gathering, family members who have not seen each other for long periods can bond, offer, and gain emotional support. This is especially true if family members live far away and have traveled long distances to attend the funeral. The Repast provides a safe place to gather, reflect and share thoughts over a meal.

3) Offer personal condolences to the family

Funerals are never planned and one is often caught unawares. In moments of grief and shock, it is sometimes difficult and not always possible to offer personalcondolencesto the family and loved ones. At the Repast, the setting is more casual and informal. Mourners will feel at ease approaching the family and offering condolences on a one-to-one basis.

4) Celebrate the life of the deceased

Death comes to remind us that life is important – that it is fleeting and can be snatched away at a moment’s notice. Spending time with friends and loved ones is a wonderful way to celebrate the life of the deceased. At a Repast, the process is informal and from the heart. Unlike speeches made at the funeral ceremony, gathering at a Repast allows people to speak more freely and with no pressure. Many will want to talk about happy episodes that they shared with the deceased. Many will recall special moments that they will treasure for years to come. Family can catch up and celebrate the Life that goes on after one of us has left this Earth.

5) Bring closure to the funeral process

The word Repast means ‘a meal’ and the symbolic process of Breaking Bread is part of many religious ceremonies. By sharing a meal with loved ones and friends, you begin to bring closure to the grieving process. People know that they are loved and cared about and that there are others struggling with the same feelings of grief. After a funeral, people tend to want to talk and not simply climb into their cars and return home to everyday life. The Repast offers an informal and loving setting that closes off the day, no matter how hard it has been.

Purpose of a Funeral Repast

When a funeral service is over, people are often left feeling alone, bereft and not sure what to do or where to go. Many tend to stand around and look for some sort of support or guidance, not wanting to just ‘pack up and leave’.

Planning an after-funeral meal or Repast is an essential part of the funeral and grieving process. It gives mourners a place to go to and allows friends and family to talk, bond and share their feelings and stories about the deceased.

A Repast meal can be a formal affair at a large venue with multiple courses. Alternatively, it can be a small gathering at a family or friend’s home where finger food is served.

A family spokesperson will usually announce the venue for the Repast after the funeral service. If one needs to travel, directions will be given. If nothing is said, you can assume that the Repast is by invite only, and the relevant people have previously been informed.

Repast Invitation

Many people wonder if they are invited to the repast meal. The after-funeral reception (Repast) is either private or open to everyone attending the funeral service.

Am I invited to the repast? If the dinner is open to all, the funeral director will announce that the family wishes to invite everyone to the repast gathering. When the funeral repast meal is private, invitations are typically sent via email or a printed letter.

Sample Repast Invitation:

Which is Correct Repast or Repass?

Generally speaking, when referring to the reception after a funeral repast and repass can be used interchangeably.

According to Webster, the definition of repass is “to pass through, over, or by again” and the definition of repast is “something taken as food”. However, the Urban dictionary defines repass as “the gathering with food, occurs directly after the burial or burial ceremony” and the definition of repast as “family meal or gathering directly following a funeral.”

Funeral Repast Origin

Looking at the etymology of the term repast, the origin was started in the late 14 century in Old French as “a meal, food” and this was derived from the Latin word repastus meaning “meal.”

Many people question if the term repast is only used in the United States. It was surprising that repast is used throughout the world and France is 20th on the list. Using Google Trends the top five countries based on popularity are:

1. Jamaica
2. Trinidad & Tobago
3. United States
4. United Kingdom
5. Australia

Where to Host a Funeral Repast – 5 Suggestions

After the funeral, people will gather for the repast. This may be a private event or an open event for all mourners depending on the family.

The venue for your repast will have to be decided on before the funeral and communicated to the guests.

Depending on the time of the day that the funeral is held, you may be serving lunch, dinner, or a mid-day finger meal.

You can hold the repast reception:

At the funeral home– This is probably the most convenient venue, as the mourners are already there and won’t need to travel. Many funeral homes have parlors that can hold a large number of people. They also often have staff who will set tables, serve and clean up after the event. The costs of this will have to be arranged beforehand.

At your church– Many people will be familiar with the church or place of worship that the deceased attended. The funeral will often start in the church before moving to the burial place. Guests can return to the church hall after the service to take part in the repast. Many churches have volunteers who will be willing to help set up tables, serve and clean up after the event.

In the home of the deceased– Having your repast at the home of the deceased does bring a very personal note to the event. This is the place that the person lived and will hold many memories. If the family is not up to the task of setting up the repast meal, a relative or close friend may step in to take charge.

At a local restaurant– Choosing the favorite restaurant of the deceased is an option for a repast meal. Arrangements will have to be made with the restaurant to ensure that the tone and mood of the venue are suited for the occasion. The details of the food to be served will also have to be arranged, as well as the number of people that the restaurant can accommodate.

In a place of nature– Choosing a place of nature that was special to the deceased can create a beautiful feeling of comfort for the mourners. It can be a park, river setting, mountain venue, or even a garden. Outdoor venues can be tricky if the weather decides to turn bad, so this will have to be kept in mind. You will also have to arrange to transport seating, food, and drinks and to get help to set up and clean up after the event is over.